Why Looking For Confidence Is Holding You Back From Success With Your Food, Body, and Business

Think about the last thing you learned. Maybe it was learning how to cook something new or trying out a new physical movement or practicing showing up for yourself or others in a new way. We often start out learning how to do something with little confidence. This thing you were learning is new and that means it is new to your body.

In a Yale study, learning was discovered to only occur when there is uncertainty.

This means that we have to normalize that to show up in new ways in your relationship with your food, body, and business will feel uncomfortable and there will not be a sense of confidence when you first start out.

How often do you hold yourself back from doing something, waiting to build confidence to be able to go do the thing you desire to do?

Let's say…

you want to try out a new physical movement like yoga. This is something you have never tried before and that means there is going to be uncertainty. If a stipulation is created that you have to be confident about going into a yoga class before trying this new thing, you may never try out a yoga class as the confidence you're looking for will only be built by going to a yoga class over and over again and creating more certainty around what it is like to practice yoga.

Let's say…

you want to wear a certain type of clothing but your mind is saying you can't wear that outfit until your body changes so you can feel more confident to wear what you want to wear. We don't actually know you will gain the confidence you're looking for by your body changing. To feel confident in that clothing you want to wear will mean wearing that outfit as you are now and every time you wear it building confidence over time that your body, as it is right here and right now, is the body that can wear those clothes.

Let's say…

you're experiencing a pattern of choosing food to emotionally self soothe every evening. At this point, you sense this pattern is no longer supporting you but right now you actually have confidence in choosing food to self soothe because you know what to expect. To build a different kind of relationship with food and learn a new food action means uncertainty needs to be invited in. Choosing to self soothe with something that is not food is going to feel uncomfortable at first. Even choosing to self soothe with food and eating in an embodied way is going to feel different. As you practice showing up for yourself in new ways, you will feel more confident in your relationship with food as your new reactions become a part of your comfort zone.

Last scenario…

If you're here with me because you're a coach or wellness professional you may have come across inner dialogues that have held you back from putting your wisdom out into the world. You may have found yourself in training after training thinking the next educational experience will be the one that will finally build your confidence to put your services out there in the world. After a decade of supervising coaches, I have seen over and over again that those who throw themselves out there, fumble, get messy, show up imperfectly, step into the unknown and uncertainty, and keep practicing their budding skills are the ones that grow the most in their confidence over time.

So if you're wanting success in cultivating a new relationship with your food, body, or the business you're so badly wanting to create, confidence can't be on your list of prerequisites. If we rely on having confidence before diving in, we may never get started. To create the Satiated Life you want to be living, all you need is the desire to begin and the rest will fall into place with time and practice.

If you're looking for support in this uncertain space you might be in, you can book a free 20 minute Connect Call with me. Email me at support@stephaniemara.com anytime.