Why The Desire To Lose Weight Needs To Take A Backseat For Your Health And Healing

About 45 million Americans go on a diet each year. The diet industry instills the message that if you just follow them perfectly you will obtain everything you desire. It's kind of like a romantic movie where the couple finally ends up together in the end but what happens after that? What happens after you lose the weight? Is that way of eating feel sustainable?

I have heard over and over again throughout my years of supporting individuals in their relationship with their food and body how disconnecting and draining diets leave them feeling. And yet every year, diet culture draws individuals back in by the hope of what if this time will be different. It can feel like an abusive relationship that keeps promising you it will be better this time only leaving you feeling abandoned.

In the process of trying to lose weight, often the mind is listened to more than the body. Your mind takes over with facts and figures telling you what and when to eat. Your mind tells you when to move your body regardless of how your body feels. And let's say you do lose weight. Once you're there, are you actually receiving what you thought you would? Do you actually feel healthier, more loved, more desired, more energetic?

Having been on the dieting roller coaster myself, I typically felt more tired from having pushed my body, less healthy from eating in a way that wasn't a sustainable way to take care of my body, and less accepted as even that body didn't feel good enough. Losing weight has to take a back seat on your health journey because there is so much more going on that needs to be attended to and addressed for your healing.

I want you to take a moment right now and reflect on what you believe you would receive from losing weight. If your body looked different, what do you believe would occur?

One of your reasons to lose weight might be for your health.

Here's the thing. We just don't know how much anyone is supposed to weigh. Everyone has different genetics, different microbiomes, different body shapes. Pressuring your body to be different puts it in a stress response leaving you feeling tight and tense. This is antithetical to your ultimate goal to feel light and energetic. We have to disconnect that losing weight needs to occur for your health. Often, going on a restrictive diet does not lead to the health you're wanting long term.

Using the tools of Somatic Eating™ and discovering what foods support you in feeling the way you want to feel can support your body in feeling heard, held, and seen. This approach to your food can support your body in moving into a relaxation response, which is where we feel the healthiest regardless of weight. If you're eating and moving in a way that leaves you feeling connected, safe, secure, grounded, energetic, and mentally clear then whatever body shape comes out of that is perhaps exactly where you're body is meant to be.

Another reason you might want to lose weight is self confidence.

Here is why that often backfires. If you attach your self confidence to something that is never going to be consistent, that is constantly changing, and cannot be controlled, a more salient sense of self confidence can never be fostered. It's time to disconnect confidence from your body image. Feeling confident doesn't come from changing your body. Feeling confident can come from embarking on a journey of accepting your body and who you are in your body. This is why weight loss needs to fade into the background because there is a deeper journey that needs to occur of self discovery and finding out who you are in the body you have. Continuing to focus on weight loss will never get you to this place where you're being called to grow.

One last reason you might want to lose weight is to ensure you will be loved.

If there is someone out there who only loves you for how you look now, do you think that is a solid ground to build a long term relationship off of? What happens as you age and your looks change over the years? Your ability to be loved is not in your looks. Weight loss will not guarantee you the love you're looking for externally or internally. Nothing in this world actually guarantees you love and so the only thing you can really rely on is how you're showing up for yourself. Others will come and go in your life. You get to be the person you're looking for and you get to show up for yourself to support you in feeling safe and connected in the body you have now. Regulating your nervous system through being present and caring for your current body is the only thing that will give you the feeling of being loved. Your body doesn't need to change. What needs to change is how you're showing up for your body.

The end results you want from a weight loss journey needs to be cultivated in your body as it is now. Everything you're looking to receive from a weight change needs to be addressed in your current body so that no matter how your body changes over time you deeply know that you deserve to feel worthy, confident, and loved just as you are.

As a reminder, my Intro to Somatic Eating™ mini course is still 50% off. The Somatic Eating™ tools you will learn in this mini course will guide you toward the embodiment you need to hear and interpret your body's messages to never rely on an external diet or expert ever again. If you have any questions, email me at support@stephaniemara.com anytime!