Why Aren't My Somatic Practices Working to Stop Binge Eating?
Somatic practices have become a buzzword as the new supplement you can take to “calm” yourself down, to shake off a trauma response, and maybe not binge eat.
They can feel alluring. When you’re struggling with food, you just want an answer. There can be panic and desperation at willing to try anything to make sure you won’t binge again. You may find yourself trying to shake, or tap, or dunk your face in ice-cold water. This may feel calming for a few minutes and then you watch yourself walk into the kitchen and grab food.
You might hear an internal voice say, “You must be doing this wrong.” “Maybe this isn’t the “right” somatic practice and I have to try different ones.” “I’m hopeless and not even somatic practices will help me.”
These thoughts are not a fact or a truth so let's first explore, what does it mean when someone on social media talks about a “somatic practice?”
The mainstream definition seems to have become a bodily action you can do to regulate your nervous system. So these are things like shaking, breathwork, cold exposure, rocking, self-containment through hugging or weighted blankets. I’m not saying these things are “bad” or “ineffective.” They can be incredibly helpful. We have to ask, what’s the point of somatic practices?
These practices offer an opportunity to learn what embodiment feels like.
Sometimes you might need external resources to discover what different sensations and emotions feel like in your body. From there, you can observe an ebb and flow in and out of different experiences. Somatic practices can facilitate self-expression as they match the intensity happening in your body. Some somatic practices can teach you how to be in your body in a way that feels grounding or more aligned with who you feel you are. Somatic practices can facilitate self-trust as you learn more about your body and how it responds to people, environments, and foods to then make different decisions that bring you into connection with yourself rather than further push you away.
When somatic practices are done in a way to disembody, fix, or coerce your body into being in a different state or sensation, they are going to feel ineffective. For example, let's say every time you enter into a fight or flight response, you go to shake to release the stored tension and get your body to calm down. This is a somatic practice done in a way that views your body as the enemy and that you're the one who has to make it change. What if your body isn't ready to move out of the fight or flight response yet? Also, if you're always trying to change how you feel, your distress tolerance doesn't get to grow.
When you’re utilizing a somatic practice to try not to binge, the somatic practice can be chosen from an external suggestion about what you could do to feel “better.” It is done in a way that is like putting a bandaid on a cut that is bleeding and needs much more attention. Every time you choose to engage in a somatic practice to "fix" your discomfort, binging will inevitably follow because your body isn't being attuned to and supported to know that it is safe to feel uncomfortable and nothing bad is going to happen.
Throw out the idea that there is an ideal somatic practice you can utilize to stop yourself from binging. To discover the somatic practice that feels in alignment with you is about growing your capacity to be in your body and listen to what it needs. You can start by practicing this when you don’t feel the urge to binge.
Here are some questions you can ask yourself to discover the somatic practice your body needs:
Am I looking to ground myself or gain more energy?
What's my current energy level?
Does my body need movement or stillness?
Do I need a guided practice, independent exploration, or external resources (like touch, a blanket, or various objects)?
If I were to move in a way that matches how I feel inside, what would that look like?
What shape or position would my body take if I let it express itself fully?
What rhythm or tempo matches my emotional state?
Are there any sounds or vibrations that I feel drawn to?
Are there any environments or smells that speak to my body right now?
Am I craving repetitive or unpredictable movements?
What's my capacity on a scale from 1-10 to navigate this on my own?
Do I need more coregulation to be with what's here?
How will I know when I'm done? What sensations am I looking for?
You might be asking after going through all of these questions, what is the difference between fixing and friending your emotions? How do you know when you're engaging in a somatic practice that will support you in feeling safe to decrease your binge eating? You’ll need to connect to the felt sense of, “Does this embodied practice bring me into a closer relationship with myself or push me further away?”
Binge eating is an attempt at re-establishing safety in your body, but it also pushes you further away from yourself and your body. To support your body in feeling safe, your body needs to feel attuned to and validated. Somatic practices that bring you into a closer relationship with yourself will decrease the urge to binge as connection is regulation. When your body feels safe to be as it is, food doesn't need to come in to make you be or feel or express yourself differently.
Going back to the example of when you move into a fight or flight response. Let's say you check in with your body and notice that it has a lot of stored energy, you feel like you could navigate what's showing up on your own, you want to feel like a ferocious wild animal that needs to explode, shaking your body vigorously may support your body in feeling seen and heard in what it says would feel good to move through what's showing up. That is you friending your body rather than fixing what is happening. Same somatic practice. Yet, in one scenario the underlying intention was to fix the discomfort that would leave you feeling further away from yourself and in the other scenario the intention was to support and listen to your body to facilitate self connection, understanding, and empathy.
A somatic practice needs to be chosen from what your body says it needs to feel safe, rather than external guidance that tells you that a somatic practice will lead to safety. No one lives in your body. They can’t guarantee how any practice will be digested in your system. Only you will know that through your own body's feedback. And, you won't know what will feel best at first. Sometimes this might be choosing an embodiment practice and tracking your body within that practice.
If you notice getting tighter, tenser, increased contraction, shallow breathing, and observe yourself start to leave your body or dissociate, that is bodily information that this somatic practice may not be resonating with your body. If you notice deeper breathing, expansion, ease, grounding, and more connection and presence, that is your body's way of saying, "I feel seen and this is supporting me."
Somatic practices are never a one-and-done. Connecting with your body, validating your emotions, and moving through your nervous system responses is a lifelong practice. Some days, weeks, and months it will feel easier to be with yourself and what is showing up, and then other times it may feel a little harder. You just get to keep on practicing.
If you're ever looking for more support in this process, you can go to stephaniemara.com and check out my 1:1 offerings or self paced programs or somaticeating.com to sign up for the waitlist for the next Somatic Eating® Program.