Transform Body Image Worries with a Somatic and Nervous System Regulation Approach

Body image concerns are often one of the many challenges that fuel disordered eating and eating disorders and are one of the worries that continue to stick around long after you've found a safe relationship with food.

There can be an expectation when you've healed your body image challenges that you'll never worry about the way your body looks, that you'll never compare your body to someone else's body ever again, that you'll love the way you look in pictures, and that you won't even care if your body changes.

A somatic approach to body image would be increasing your capacity to be with body discomfort, meeting your body worry with curiosity, exploring the nervous system message in your body judgment, and regardless of what you think about your body, knowing that you are still safe in this body.

It can be freeing to approach body image concerns as something that is body communication and is not going to go away. You can step out of the battle of trying to change your body or love the way your body looks. There are things about your body that you don't like and that is alright. What is not alright is having those body judgments dictate your behavior and lead to harming your body.

This is why increasing your capacity to be with yourself…

when you're struggling to be in this body is crucial to decreasing food coping mechanisms. Food behaviors like undereating, restricting, emotional eating, and binge eating may momentarily support you in getting some space from the loud body criticism that happens. But, you'd have to keep eating or restricting to continue to disembody to decrease the volume of those body judgments.

So while this may sound odd, the first baby step here is to own that there are things you don't like about your body, that just because you don't like them doesn't mean you have to do anything about that, and that you're going to continue to have days where it feels hard to be in this body the way that it is. I notice a huge exhale in my own body even saying that.

When you reflect on the most important relationships in your life, some things irritate you about the people you love the most. That doesn't mean that you leave them or appreciate them in your life any less. You're able to see a bigger picture that even with the things that may drive you a little crazy they bring so much joy, connection, and safety into your life.

Any reaction you have toward your body is information about your nervous system and beliefs.

Let's go through an example of what this might look like.

You hear the thoughts, "My stomach is disgusting. Ugh. I really need to lose weight."

First, pause and notice how this thought feels. You might notice tension, tightness, contraction, and more shallow breathing. This is potentially how you were already feeling before you had this thought but now you have a more manageable problem to deal with. 

Body image concerns peak when you're in a fight, flight, freeze, or flop state. These states get activated when your body perceives danger. Perceived danger could be the perception you're in danger like interacting with people when people have been perceived as dangerous because you've been hurt by people in the past. Perceived danger could also be that the current environment reminds you of a past experience and now your body is re-living the trauma from your past and is not in the here and now anymore.

Trauma makes your window of tolerance smaller which refers to the range of nervous system arousal levels where you can function optimally. When you have a large window of tolerance, you can ebb and flow in and out of your parasympathetic nervous system and sympathetic nervous system with greater ease. When your window of tolerance is small, you move into a fight or flight or flop state much faster. Now, if you don't feel like you have the capacity to be with yourself when you feel like you're in danger, and you also don't know what is activating a threat response, your body and brain will come up with a reason why you feel triggered.

You've been taught by family, friends, and media that your body's appearance is dangerous.

If you don't have the "right" body type, it can feel like your life is in danger. It can feel like your family will disown you, you won't have any friends who accept you, and you won't find a partner who unconditionally loves you because that's what we're taught from Hallmark and Disney movies is THE most important thing. And the fact that weight stigma does exist, where a person is treated differently by doctors and even if they're applying for a job, makes the body changing a very scary event.

In comes diet culture to save the day. Dieting can give your body a sense of freedom that it has a choice around the dangers of looking the "wrong" way. Yet, as you can see, the initial body judgment wasn't originally activated by your body image. It was triggered by not feeling safe in your body and within a split second your body and brain went to work to find some way to feel safe again by focusing on how you can change your body. If your focus continues to stay on altering your body though, the real somatic work of growing your capacity to be with discomfort never gets to happen.

So the practice is when you hear those familiar body image concerns arise, become an outside witness to them.

See them with compassion. Sometimes, it can feel safer to focus on your body's appearance than it does to attend to how you feel and the trauma response that has potentially been activated. When I hear my own familiar body image story come up in my thoughts, I first name what is happening. I then get curious about how I've been feeling that day, that week, or that month. I reflect on what's been going on and if I've been living my days more in a stressed sympathetic state. I start to assess if there is anything that I need to support my body in feeling safe. If there is something that I can engage in, I've noticed that the body image story naturally dissipates and goes away as my body gets what it is actually looking for which often has nothing to do with the way my body looks.

Start to experience your body image worries as interpretive instead of literal. With the new year coming up, there are going to be more social media posts, commercials, and comments by your friends and family about what diet they're starting or what weight loss drug they're getting on. Keep connecting back with yourself to explore what you need to feel safe within these conversations and within the discomfort that may arise. I'm here for you on this journey so if you're ever looking for more support, email me at support@stephaniemara.com anytime.