Food Is Love

Right before I sat down to write and record this week's episode, I ate some of my homemade donuts, you can find the recipe on my website here. I love these! I have such wonderful memories around donut eating. I grew up in CT and whenever my parents would pile me and my two older brothers into the car to visit my grandparents, we would stop off at Dunkin' Donuts and get a dozen donuts for breakfast in the car. My favorites were always anything with sprinkles on it and the jelly-filled ones. I would of course get a sugar high and break out laughing for no apparent reason.

I often reflect on these memories in how many experiences I had growing up that food was love. From the time we are born, food is often the first form of love we received as a baby from a parent or caretaker. For the rest of life, if we're not feeling seen, heard, held, acknowledged, and supported, food naturally comes in to provide us with the sensations and emotions we are looking to feel. Food can be our very best friend supporting us in navigating difficult moments.

Something that we're taught from our external world though is that eating food to self soothe is "wrong." That we're doing something "bad" if we choose to eat food to support with emotionally re-grounding. I'm here today to give a very different message. Food gets to be one of the many tools in your self care toolbox. You're never ever doing anything wrong or bad when you choose food to feel connected, safe, and in control. You're not broken or something to be fixed just because you're eating food for non-physical hunger reasons. I have seen over and over again that the faster we accept how emotionally grounding food can be and that we get to eat whenever we need to for physical or emotional satiation, that we put the power back in ourselves and less in the food where food actually becomes less desirable to reach for with time.

I want you to take a moment right now and think of a few powerful memories you have around eating food with your family or friends or loved ones. What did you eat? How did you feel? What was the environment you were eating in? Was it a holiday or a birthday or a celebration? Was it eating something out of a sense of tradition and rhythm and routine? Remember how special it was eating that food, with that person, at that moment.

Every time we choose food to emotionally satiate we can make that moment feel special. Light candles, put on some music, plate your food in a beautiful way, put on a funny movie, find an environment you want to eat that food in. Maybe that is taking your food outside and, even if it is 11:00 pm at night, eat your snack under the stars. You can embrace that you're engaging in an act of love by feeding yourself and support yourself in making that moment feel truly special. Creating amazing memories with food does not need to involve another person. You can cultivate beautiful eating experiences just with yourself so that no matter the reason you're eating it is done from a deep place of knowing you deserve that love.